31 Comments
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Rachel Fryer's avatar

Editing your Strava run name to point out your run was "slow" when the stats show your run was at my fastest pace when I'm really trying 🤨

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Isabel Mohan's avatar

Haha yes, maybe with a side-note that they are also injured!

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Lisa's avatar

Runners that need to have their stereo system with them as they run and want to share their musical tastes with the world.

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Isabel Mohan's avatar

Or even a coaching app on loud!

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Verity Wright's avatar

Love these, the first one 🤣 whilst also including in the bio how many children they have!

Can I add “I’m not feeling it/I’m injured so I’ll run with you”,

parkrun tattoo on the calf (yes I saw this last week) scrub that, any distance/event/logo tattooed on the calf. In fact, you’ve started me off…..marathon/tri event rucksack over normal clothes whilst supporting at parkrun, no, let’s take it up a level, running backwards with friend/spouse in said normal clothes/rucksack for the last lap of parkrun! I could go on 🤣

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Isabel Mohan's avatar

Haha I nearly included the tattoo but there's a nice man I see at parkrun every week with one and so it felt too close to the bone (specifically, his calf bone).

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Chris Fehr's avatar

I believe those cheek lifting and spreading pants are the reason my place of employment needed a dress code after 35 years of allowing us to dress ourselves. One summer student seemed to want to show everyone exactly where her sphincter is. I don’t envy the manager that had to talk to her about it.

I post my distance PR’s on Facebook and text a friend every time. Broke my 5k record 3 times this year!

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Isabel Mohan's avatar

Oh wow, imagine having to say the words "butt scrunch" in a professional environment.

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Chris Fehr's avatar

Once you determine you have an enforceable dress code you need a way to define everything so that if you did fire someone for repeated offences you could defend that decision in court.

On the other side of the coin I pedal the 40 km to work once a year most summers and walk to my desk, drop my things and then head to the shower. Once behind the change room door where there is zero privacy except women aren’t allowed in. I can walk around naked and shower. I do this after shift change so I’m often nearly on my own but most of the men that actually get dirty at work change and shower in one big space. Outside of that space they shall not expose their midriff*!

*the one item I recall from skimming the dress code when it was sent out.

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Jenny Scott's avatar

Guilty of a lot of these but I want to defend the hydration pack at parkrun as it's a great way to carry your belongings and ditch your jacket when you go from freezing to boiling within the first km. I have so many more to add.

Rounding up your run so it's an evening number on your watch/ Strava etc.

People who can't convert miles to km "I only run in kilometers".

Run streaks.

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Isabel Mohan's avatar

That’s a very good point about hydration packs! See, one person’s ick is another person’s practical solution.

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KK's avatar

Be kind to people with hydration packs. You never know why they might need it. My brother is a recent throat cancer - radiation nuked his saliva glands. Now that's he's back running, the hydration pack is essential even for the shortest run.

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KK's avatar

The cheeky butt scrunch leggings though..there is zero excuse for those ;)

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Lindsay N's avatar

This is superb! A non-running one - fitness class instructors bellowing ‘OPTION! OPTION!’ over some 50000 decibel Europop to demo a low effort version of a lunge/burpee is intensely grating!

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Isabel Mohan's avatar

Oh yes, flashbacks from my time as a David Lloyd member

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Jason Ramasami's avatar

This was very amusing. Thankyou.

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Caroline's avatar

Poor Cathy 🤣

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Isabel Mohan's avatar

I was desperately trying to find a name that doesn’t belong to anyone I actually know!

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Sarah Best's avatar

Can we add people who wear Lululemon to the same point as those who wear Sweaty Betty on the school run when they're not planning on exercising?

Also, people who leave their f*&king phone and/or towel on benches in gyms and then wander off. FFS

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Isabel Mohan's avatar

You can tell how gentrified an area is by the activewear brand most ubiquitous at the school gates.

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Sarah Manley's avatar

Or a water bottle

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Sarah Best's avatar

Oh my goodness, yes! Why??

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Sarah Manley's avatar

Annoying!

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Geraldine's avatar

I’ve just subscribed because you made me laugh so much. I am contemplating a slow crawl back to parkrun after a few months off with a twisted ankle

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Isabel Mohan's avatar

Ahhh thank you so much! I will try to still be funny in 2025. Sorry to hear about the ankle, maybe do a tail-walk volunteer or something to ease you back in?

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Katie Massie-Taylor's avatar

Just 🤣

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Isabel Mohan's avatar

Thank you for being easy to amuse.

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Jane's avatar

That’s a LOT of shots fired at once.

U OK hun?

My score was 11 ;)

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Titi Talabi Olaneye's avatar

This was super funny....especially for me as a new runner who like you, finished the C25K and thereafter made running my life! 😂😂😂

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David Henry's avatar

This is incredible 😂

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Andrew's avatar

“Describing yourself as a “fitness girlie” when you are, in fact, 43”

To an age-appropriate audience? Go for it!

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